resolutions, week 7

do I have other blog posts queued in the drafts? yes. am I drowning in things to do and therefore have yet to finish any of them? also yes.

in the meantime…

write something every day (except Shabbat). this was not as great this week; I even dropped the ball on my bullet journal and just took a few days off from life and habits. (to be fair, this detour coincided with my return to Dragon Age: Inquisition and my drowning in Cullen feels, but.) I’ve got some interesting things to write coming down my queue, but it’s a matter of managing my time so that I can write them. we’ll see.

be better about money. the IRS saga continues, unfortunately, and I know that it’s just a game of chicken between me and USCIS and the IRS, haha. I think I’ve been doing okay in other aspects, but I also know this is a hella tough month financially so I have to figure out if I can keep it together moving forward.

self-validate more. I actually have continued to do well in this, which is really surprising and exciting—I had absolutely expected this to be the toughest resolution to stick to! I think this will be harder when I’m having really low days, but so far I’ve been pretty even and validating myself has been pretty comfortable.

okay, back to crying about Opportunity and Dragon Age: Inquisition…

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resolutions, week 6

(yes the title has been shortened, let’s roll)

write something every day (except Shabbat) – after a fair amount of consideration, I am now counting days where I wrote something academic as days in which I wrote, just not tracking those words in my overall count… which means that I did, in fact, write every day over the past week (even if my word count dipped quite a bit due to the pile of final essays I was grading)! the routine is not where I want it to be yet, as I’m not writing for consistent amounts of time or at consistent times, but I do feel more creative!

be better about money. talked to an accountant re: taxes, but now have to duke it out with the IRS. hopefully next week that will be sorted. this month is going to be hella tough financially since we’re having a shorter paycheck due to weather-related school cancellations and it’s the month where our roommate’s job switches to a different payment schedule… but we’re trying to stay positive!

self-validate more. therapist noted that I actually did this a lot in our session this week (I literally said the words “I’m proud of myself” and, while I have felt that before, I don’t think I’ve ever dropped the words quite so casually!) and it felt great to have someone recognize that this is something I’ve been working on! I’ve also just been celebrating my own success, even when it’s minor, a lot more… coworker says I’m starting to treat myself like I treat other people.

continuing to make progress so far… we’ll see how this goes. until next week!

weekly update on resolutions, week 5

hello from Chiberia, y’all~

Write something every day (except Shabbat). I’ve actually only netted 1K more in the past week, which was actually just in the posts I made to this blog—a far cry from my 21K-in-four-weeks rate—but to be fair I was absurdly close to the threshold for pneumonia last week, so I’ll cut myself some slack. I did brainstorm some upcoming posts, start some drafts, and prep my bullet journal for the next month—so, you know, points to me.

Be better about money. Taxes are still not done—I have to contact an accountant because I’ve got some questions—but I did pull up my credit report and go on a quest yesterday to make sure every single payment reported is correct. I’ve also been working on the budget for next month, so I’ve got high hopes of continuing to improve in this category moving forward!

Self-validate more. This past week, I’ve done better at being nice to myself when I stumble and not giving myself too much crap for any blank spots in my habit tracker, so I’m pretty proud of myself right now. I just have to keep working on this moving forward. I also put my foot down about not going anywhere in this Arctic weather, so I’ll take that as self-care too. 🙂

until next week!

time (is relative)

(this is not the post I had mentioned I was working on, but it’s so relevant after last night that I took a detour just as Shabbat ended to talk about this)

If you know anything about me, you know that I struggle with making decisions, staying focused, and being on time. Like, literally, those are my top three struggles. (How it never occurred to me that I might have ADHD is seriously wild.) Now, for a long time, I have talked about how my issues with time have to do with the fact that I don’t see time in a linear fashion (Business Insider’s explanation of linear-active time is the best I’ve seen re: my own conception of time)—but I think 11.5 years in the States have changed that a little bit.

Yesterday, I spent some time with my uncle for lunch—and it became abundantly clear that I am starting to see time differently, even though he has lived here for longer than I have.

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weekly update on resolutions, week 4

it’s that time of the week again y’all~

Write something every day (except Shabbat). I’ve only missed a grand total of five days in the whole month, which is totally wild for me! I’ve also written 21.5K words this month, way beyond anything I’d imagined!

Be better about money. I’ve collected all the stuff I need, so I am hoping to be able to report that my taxes are done when next I give y’all an update. On a bright side, I’ve gotten up to date on almost every account and I’ve got a plan moving forward. On a “need to work on” note, I didn’t actually spend time cooking until yesterday, so that “restaurants” tab on Mint has been getting a lot of action.

Self-validate more. This one has remained difficult, but I’m happy to say that I’ve kept working on it, and I’ve got the whole year!

there are a couple of posts in the drafts that need to be finished and queued; hopefully one of them will be posted before the end of this week and then we’ll have another next week 💖

revisiting my resistance manifesto

I wrote this two years ago and, unfortunately, it is still way too true—so in the light of today’s awfulness, I’m revisiting it and putting it here for posterity.

NOTES: I used the original spelling of 43’s name to avoid trolls but also because I refuse to let that surname die. Also, this is unedited except for the addition of bold italics for emphasis and the rewriting of the last sentence, which I edited to reflect my current description of my identity.

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weekly update on resolutions

let’s check in on progress for my three big-picture goals for the year…

Write something every day (except Shabbat). I’ve actually only missed a couple of days (literally) so far this month and I’ve written just under 15,200 words (not counting this post). It has been really exciting, but grad school started this week so I expect I’ll slow down a little bit on the output… but I am going to keep working to find time to write! I’ve also been reading for leisure almost every day, even if for just a few minutes at a time, to give myself time to recharge before going back to work. It’s been really nice so far!

Be better about money. I’ve been trying to spend less with mixed results, but I have made an effort to track all my bills and get everything on AutoPay and just generally make sure I’m current on all accounts and have a clearer idea of how much money is in my checking at all times! Overall, I do feel like I’ve been doing better at not hiding from my finances, but I know that there is still a lot of work to be done! On a bright side, I did already prep all of my itemized deductions for my side gig (including my miles!) so I am literally just waiting on W-2s/1099s so I can file my taxes.

Self-validate more. One of the reasons I started a bullet journal (which my therapist is thrilled about!) is so I can have visual representations of my progress, which will make it easier to remember that I am growing and I should be giving myself credit for it. I’ve also been working on celebrating my successes (even if all I did was finish my to-do list) and talking myself through the stumbles in a less negative way—so I’m excited about my progress so far!